Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
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