Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize