I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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