Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So much Jack, so little girl.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
