gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
my poor anus
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
