Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
