just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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