its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
