just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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