She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
