he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
