She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I've blown a few things in my day
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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