He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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