I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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