hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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