What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
