yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
