Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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