she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
soo... how was my night?
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