i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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