Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
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