there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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