Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
