So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
