ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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