I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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