Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
