I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Randomize