So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
