I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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