Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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