Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
