Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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