Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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