After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
love makes seman taste better
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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