erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
it's great music for shaving your balls
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Your cock deserves a montage
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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