Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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