I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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