Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
