he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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