I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
