Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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