I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he fucked my hip out of place.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Randomize
