so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
