It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
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