how hairy? two words: wookie tits
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
people are starting to question the shark bite story
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
