Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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