Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
