so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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