HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
