I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Actions speak louder than pants.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize