Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
