i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
