why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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